Adoption Journey

It has been a while since my last post...I feel that I needed some time off. I needed time off from thinking about children, thinking about how unfair this situation was, thinking "why me", thinking about the future. I guess I needed to heal.

Time has passed and like everything, wounds heal...although they will always be part of me, they have shaped me and George for that matter, changed who I am as a person...I think for the better, I am definitely a stronger person.

During this time I figured since I am changing one piece of my life...why not change all of it. I have applied for a totally new position as a Marketing Manager within my company...it has been a solid month of interviewing...I have what I hope is my last interview this week. I am crossing my fingers...I think the challenge and the change will be good for my soul. However, if it is meant to be then it will happen...if not then I am meant to be just where I am for a while.

That is the attitude I have taken lately...things are definitely meant to me. I mean, yes you have to make things happen for yourself but once you do that as Green Day said "life takes you by the wrist and directs you where to go" and I feel that happening in my life ever more often these days. I am trying to listen and pray for our direction.

One such direction has been chosen for us and that is adoption...at first I thought we are going to China and doing domestic adoption. However, after meeting with our Social Worker this week...George and I both feel our direction is distinctly being pulled to either Korea or Russia. I am more excited than ever and I can't get the vision or what our child is going to look like out of my mind. One minute I envision a blond hair blue eye boy, another minute a beautiful Korean girl and then the next a little boy with dark features. The doors of possibility are wide open and our hearts are open.

I keep thinking about the moment George and I meet the child that is meant for us...we meet our son or daughter, the first minute we hold them, getting on a plane and bringing them home. The first time they meet their grandparents, aunts and uncles...the love that this child will be given. I envision a toddler chasing Hercules around and driving him crazy. I envision a time of selflessness instead of selfishness.

We have been led on this journey for a reason...and I know there is a special baby waiting for us and it makes me tear to thinking within 18-20 months I could be here updating my blog with pictures of our beautiful child.

The next step in our adoption process is the medical exams and home visit...I hope Hercules doesn't blow it for us:-)

Please keep us in your prayers and pray that this child will come sooner rather than later.